Modern Family returned this week with all the hot golfing action you can handle!  Jay, Phil, and Mitch hit the links with Pepper (Nathan Lane), and we learned that Phil has never heard “Cat’s in the Cradle” before.  Gloria took a skeptical Alex to a psychic and left Haley and Dylan in charge of the baby.  Cam and Manny butted heads over a Phantom of the Opera production, and Luke sang like an angel.  There was a lot going on this week, and we’ve got your back with the best lines from Modern Family “A Slight at the Opera”.

“I’m not the strongest golfer, and I think it’s holding me back in business. Too bad deal aren’t closed in a trampoline park; I’d just lazyback into a rudolph into a quadriffus right up the corporate ladder.” — Phil

CLAIRE: “Are you not the least bit sorry? I could have broken a toe!”
PHIL: “Honey, I’m sorry for dozens of things every day that actually happen. If I start apologizing for things that don’t happen, how productive of a person would I be?”

“I will be recording today’s rehearsal, but don’t let that make you self-conscious. I’m only using it to pinpoint your mistakes.” — Cam

”She’s vicious. Our last music teacher, Mr. Namagachi, never recovered from her article, ‘Anything Blows’.”–Manny, talking about a theater critic

“I don’t know how Marcus got the lead, but I know how he got sick – from chewing all that scenery.” — Manny

“I’ve always been a bit of a drill sergeant when it comes to sports. With the new baby, Gloria’s been bugging me to have more patience. But come on, he’s been alive a month. How hard is it to support your own head?” — Jay

”I grew up golfing with my father, the great Chaim Saltzman. Or as he was known around the clubhouse, Chad Treadwell.”–Pepper, speaking about his golfing pedigree

“You’re kicking up more sand than a sea turtle laying eggs!” — Jay, to Phil on the golf course

“My old tumbling master in college used to yell at me all the time – it just made me better. He’s say terrible things about my manhood, he’d throw the chalk bag at me, he’d call me and taunt me over the summer to keep me sharp.” — Phil

“There’s no Renaissance Fair. And even if there was, I wouldn’t go. I’d be the laughingstock of the Young Astronomers’ Club.” — Alex, admitting that she’s making stuff up for the psychic

“It’s like Scrabble with Haley. After a while, you’re just playing against yourself.”–Alex, about how easy it is to pull one over of Gloria

“In my production, the Phantom appears in the first scene. Because, after all, it’s not called Christine and Raoul of the Opera.” — Cam

“OK Manny, quick question: Did you forget the notes I gave you or just choose to ignore them?” — Cam

“Maybe we can pump Marcus full of whatever they gave those bike riders.” — Cam

HALEY: “Having kids is fun!”
DYLAN: “And easy!”

“He was glorious. Every note, every nuance, I was transported. And I was furious. But my quarrel wasn’t with Luke, it was with God.” — Manny, on Luke’s performance

Any favorites you’d like us to add?  Post ‘em in the comments!

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