This week on Modern Family, the Dunphys got an RV, Mitch and Cam were probably too competitive at a gymnastics meet for five-year-olds, and Jay and Gloria were excessively nosy.  Manny found some new directions for his poetry, and all of us were jealous of Luke’s sweet “Super Bacon” t-shirt.  It’s the second-to-last episode of the season, and we’ve got the best lines from Modern Family – “Games People Play”.

PHIL: “I sold a home to the one and only Pete Johnson.”

CLAIRE: “There’s only one Pete Johnson?”


“And he told me I could take Jolene out any time. Yeah, I named her!”–Phil, regarding a borrowed RV (and a potential pet llama)


MITCH: “Lily goes to gymnastics class.”

CAM: “In one short year, I’ve seen her blossom from a little girl who couldn’t do a somersault…”

MITCH: “Into one who kind of can. And by that standard, we also have a black belt, art prodigy and prima ballerina in our family.”


“What kind of man writes poetry on a computer?” — Manny, on why he doesn’t have a backup copy of his poem


“In other shocking news, Phil subscribes to a trampoline magazine.” — Jay, going through the Dunphy’s mail


“I don’t want my mom there. I’m exploring some darker themes I’m not sure she’s ready for. Poems like ‘The Umbillical Noose’, ‘A Jail Called Mom’, ‘Smother Nature’. She’ll just find some way to make it all about her.” – Manny


“Obviously the novelty of the situation was delaying the inevitable. But I didn’t want to get halfway into a trip to Yellowstone before Phil discovered what malevolent hellspawn we have for children. Whom I love very much.”–Claire


HALEY: “She can wear whatever she wants after I’ve had it for six months.”

ALEX: “Or I get it automatically if you buy anything that looks like it.”


CAM: “That’s Abby. She’s the best in class. She’s our competition. I’ve never wanted to beat a kid so badly.”

MITCH: “Are you not hearing these?”


MANNY: “Maybe they didn’t invite you because you’re a couple of snoops?”

JAY: “All right, Mr. Goody Two Shoes…”

MANNY: “A trait normal parents would value.”


“Horse mouth! That’s a good one!” — Gloria, not getting Jay’s drawing for “kiss my ass”.


“I guess I’m just a naive boob who thought we like each other.” — Phil, after the family falls apart in an RV


MITCH: “I can’t stand the way everybody’s staring at us.”

CAM: “Yeah, I know. It’s the way we look at people who walk with their pet birds.”


“I basically built a ticking time bun.” –Cam, on the hairstyle he crafted for one of Lily’s competitors


“Any slower and she’d be the US Mail, right? That one’s gonna kill at the warehouse.” — UPS guy


“Dad’s in the middle of a super-sad dude hug.” — Luke


HALEY: “A boy named Alex likes you?”

ALEX: “Yeah, it’s weird.”


“You guys have given me the courage to go back in there, stand up to my wife, and tell her she was right all along.” — Phil

“I’ve been through every state. Depressed. Catatonic. Arkansas.”–Another Dad Phil was commiserating with after he pulled the RV over.

”Maybe we should just suck it up and go to Jellystone this summer.”—Haley

Any more you want to add?  Let us know in the comments!

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2 Responses to Best Lines from Modern Family – “Games People Play”

  1. Sarah says:

    I’m finally catching up on my DVR and I WANT that Super Bacon tshirt for my son! Any idea?

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