Once again, we’ve assembled the best TV quotes of the week.  We’re pretty sure we’re the only website that does this.  In fact, we might have invented it and anybody who claims otherwise can expect to hear from our lawyers.  

“There’s always been more than enough death in the world for my taste.  I can do without it in my leisure time.” — Tyrion Lannister, Game of Thrones

 

“This isn’t cannibalism.  It’s only cannibalism if we’re equals.” — Hannibal Lecter to Abel Gideon, Hannibal

 

“I’m trying not to eat anything with a central nervous system.” — Bedelia Du Maurier, Hannibal

 

“Everywhere I look, I see giant eyes with worms coming out of them!  Where are our giant eyes with worms coming out of them?” — Billy Crystal wishing his show had the marketing budget of The Strain, The Comedians

 

“I have orders to execute him on sight and then dissect his penis.  President Obama was very clear about that.” — General Hatrick, Comedy Bang! Bang!

 

REGGIE:  “You didn’t think one bullet was gonna kill the Reg Man, did you?”

SCOTT:  “Reggie?  I don’t understand…. you call yourself the Reg Man?” — Comedy Bang! Bang!

 

“Please clock out at the end of your shift.  And, uh, we labor to keep the bathrooms tidy.  I trust you’ll comply.” — Eugene wrapping up Joe’s employee orientation, Halt and Catch Fire

 

BIG HEAD:  “Three more classes and I can get my boat license.”

RICHARD:  “Really?  How many does it take?”

BIG HEAD:  “Three.” — Silicon Valley

 

“Anal dilation aside, what do you think of our case?” — Erlich, Silicon Valley

 

CHET:  “You know how, if you never fall asleep, the days don’t change?”

GLENN:  “I was born almost twenty-seven years ago, not yesterday.  Of course I know that.” — Childrens Hospital

 

“I say we’ve got a new drug, with apologies and a tip of the proverbial hat to one Huey Lewis, of course.” — Glenn Richie, Childrens Hospital

 

“If I had kids, which actually I do, this bill would be my baby.” — Ben Cafferty, Veep

 

“Gary has a very limited set of skills.  Mainly I would say they are picking objects up and putting objects back down.” — Selina Meyer, Veep
Any to add?  Let us know in the comments!

 

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