Sorry I took a vacation and missed last week’s Bachelor Pad recap, but in watching Monday’s episode only and not going back to the previous week, for the life of me I can’t figure out who was booted …which means I either missed a non-elimination week or the two voted out were non-essential, boring, and useless. Feel free to tell me what happened in the comments section. I’d love to know.

This week, we’re going to focus on Super-Fan David (aka David Mallet), the morons in the house not named Stagliano, and Ed. But before I begin, let me tell you why I’m so happy NASA and our nerds over there landed a spaceship on Mars. See, all we ever hear about is the rapidly deteriorating intelligence of our society and how America has the lowest math and science scores in decades and how we rank way, way down on a list of “smart” countries. And when you watch Bachelor Pad or see that YouTube video of the girl who doesn’t understand “miles per hour”, you start to believe we’re getting pretty stupid. But …when you read about all the math equations needed to land that thing on the planet Mars, you realize the “low scores” are an average and take into account Bachelor Pad folks and that blonde girl, you should feel a little better about America …our top-end math and science nerds are still holding their own.

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2 Responses to Bachelor Pad, Episode 3 (Ed Trusts Too Much)

  1. lise lange says:

    Oh good gawd again mr. bean spunky,
    i will confess, i have been finishing up the wardrobe work on a maaaajor opera so wtf am i doing watching yet another new episode of breaking bad AND bachelor pad AFTER reading what you have to say?? yes, dang dude, you are that good and that funny and that informative and right on. i can read what you have to say ABOUT a show and then watch it anyway!!! LOL!!! that is so great! i was all set to get on here and rant and rave about the CLASSIC all-time one liners on bachelor pad episode 3, but honestly? that show draaaaags so horribly that by the time i had memorized “i got in the nut bag” and “he studies this show” and about a brazillion others-by the time i got to the TORTUROUS rose ceremony AFTER the prom (wtf again!!!) and after the hot tub stupidity and hooking up stupidity and the “what is your name?” stupidity and YAWN is this episode STILL going on? i forgot most of the STUPIDEST one-liners i have ever EVER heard on any reality show. honestly. i am so deeply ashamed of myself for snoozing, eating pasta, brushing my corgis, and beading a steampunk jacket WHILE i was watching AND still watching the entire thing!!! good grief. how in ANY country on the planet do absolute psychos like the blonde one and the mentally deranged one get on television and actually have their moments of being listened to? and donna? no man ever does that to me? REALLY? because, i am sorry sweetheart, but in the land of so cal you are a DIME A DOZEN. seriously. and my spunky!!!! you CRACK ME UP because i missed last week as well and i had no idea who got voted off either. but hey, after 5 minutes of the deep philosophical discussions on this weeks episode–it just didnt matter, right? THANK GOODNESS for the mars landing is all i have to say. which brings me to my next tv obsession. i think i told you that i came to breaking bad late in the game and pulled a marathon–watching the ENTIRE series in just over two weeks. ok. yes. that was border line crazy, but i had just had a birthday and i needed an unconventional way to celebrate! you understand, i’m sure. so, so bittersweet to watch the whole pathetic fall from basically a decent but bland man to a pathological fairly ugly cruel mental oh so bald guy. your recaps are perfect, as usual. mike is all men. jesse is heart-rendingly pathetically tragic. the break-up with darling friendgirl with child of horrible name? brock? whaaaat? sad beyond words. and finally a woman so completely weird and creepy!!! love her! poor marie. poor skylar. throw them both in the pool i guess. and you were BRILLIANT with the scarface!!! hahahahah as an ex-english teacher–you can tell by my proper use of caps–the foreshadowing is killer. i remember when my hs students beeeegged me to watch that movie and STUNNED i did and reported back to them. pretty unforgettable stuff and i guess that is what the writer will do to us after an unforgettable premise, unbelievable development, and unreal progression–the ending will be, must be pretty unforgettable and no doubt, a predictable bang-up. i just have got to wonder, along with pretty much the entire viewing community of this country–will anyone be left standing? will walter pull a pacino? i do not recommend watching the entire series as i did. sometimes i spook myself when i see a bullet faced bald man or a punky blue-eyed kid outside the rite-aid. and really, what is our addiction to this blue meth extravaganza? npr is doing not one, not two, but THREE interviews with the characters!!! love you man. keep it coming. i always enjoy your commentary.

  2. Don Kowalewski says:

    lisa …i think it’s my duty to start listing the night’s best quotes.

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