Hi all!

Pretty good week this time around – Better Things and Good Girls both return. Also, Whiskey Cavalier takes its regular spot on the schedule. That’s all swell! American Idol comes back on Sunday, but I’m not listing it because I think it’s an inherently mean show and they’re giving Seacrest a pass on some predatory behavior, so I’m just pointing out here that it’s on and we’ll never speak of it again.

Here’s what to watch on TV this week!

 

MONDAY

NBC

10-11 The Enemy Within – SERIES PREMIERE! NBC mixes up their procedural formula with a show about a master criminal forced to work with the cops. How is it not exactly Blacklist? This time, the criminal is a lady.

TNT

9-10 I Am the Night – Jay and Fauna search for a way to make it to Hawaii. Isn’t there a bridge from the mainland? That’s right, I’m referencing story bits from previous seasons of BoJack Horseman. Why wouldn’t I?

TRUTV

10:30-11 Jon Glaser Loves Gear – Jon begrudgingly goes swing dancing, and I can’t imagine that there is any sort of gear involved. But, you know, there’s no gear in tucking and he got super into that.

 

TUESDAY

NBC

9-11 World of Dance – SEASON PREMIERE! I keep forgetting that this is a real show and not the thing the co-producer was pitching in Season 3 of UnREAL. Man, remember how great Season 1 of that show was, but then it kept going?

TRUTV

10-10:30 At Home with Amy Sedaris – Amy tries to bounce back from a case of Crafter’s Block. Man, I love this show. TruTV is doing really great right now and are inexplicably running all of their originals at the same time. Just making sure they have nothing or like 36 weeks of the year.

TBS

10:30-11 Miracle Workers – A troublesome human complicates Craig and Eliza’s plan to save Earth. You’d assume that’s the President, right? I don’t know if it is, but I feel like it would be a good story.

COMEDY CENTRAL

10-10:30 Drunk History – Oooh! It’s an episode on femme fatales including Mata Hari and Catwoman. That last one is not guaranteed, but I’m assuming.

10:30-11 Corporate – Matt and Jake get up to mischief while working on Labor Day. I like the use of “mischief” because it seems like they’re elves or something.

 

WEDNESDAY

CBS

8-9 Survivor – First-time players bond in an attempt to get a returnee out of the game. I support this effort. Returning players bum me out.

ABC

8-8:30 The Goldbergs – Cousin Gleb from Russia comes to visit, and I would ordinarily complain about the half-assed “oh, foreign names are funny” use of “Gleb”, but there is a Russian dancer on Dancing with the Stars who is actually named Gleb, so they are factually accurate.

8:30-9 Schooled – Controversy arises when two students show up to school in backward clothes. Seven episodes in and they’re already so low on nineties trends that they have to hit Kriss Kross. What a dumb decade.

9-9:30 Modern Family – Well, this is an episode about Lily getting her period, sensitively titled “Red Alert”. I did not make that up.

9:30-10 Single Parents – Miggy throws a party because he feels old. I fall asleep on the couch watching Colbert because I feel old. We have very different approaches.

10-11 Whiskey Cavalier – SERIES PREMIERE! In case you missed the pilot after the Oscars, it’s back again in the regular time slot. You have no excuses!

TRUTV

10-10:30 I’m Sorry – Andrea tries to get her friend to open up about her divorce, and the ad mentions something about a certain device. A personal device. Don’t make me say it!

SYFY

10-11 Deadly Class – Hey, this is the show I’m most behind on! I don’t have anything to say due to my failures as a viewer.

 

THURSDAY

FOX

8-9 GothamBullock’s past comes back to haunt him, Riddler and Penguin’s escape plan hits a snag, and Bruce and Alfred explore the tunnels beneath the city. And also it looks like there are two Barbaras which is objectively a good idea and maybe it means Clayface?

NBC

9-9:30 Brooklyn Nine-Nine – Holt becomes suspicions when his lifelong nemesis is killed in a prison transport accident. That doesn’t seem hilarious, but I have nothing but confidence.

BRAVO

8-9 Top Chef – The five remaining chefs travel to Macau for the final competitions of the Kentucky season. That tracks.

FX

10-10:40 Better Things – SEASON PREMIERE! Sam and Max go on a trip. In fact, you might even say – Sam and Max Hit the Road! Is this episode a setup to reference a LucasArts point and click adventure game from LucasArts? Almost definitely not, but I’m not going to let it rest.

COMEDY CENTRAL

10:30-11 The Other Two – Cary takes a big swing and debuts a new look to advance his career. Like when I went through a tie phase. It didn’t help.

 

SATURDAY

NBC

11:30-1 am Saturday Night Live – John Mulaney hosts! I honestly thought he already hosted this season, but I don’t care. You want him to host twice a season? I am on board for that. Give him three!

 

SUNDAY

FOX

8-8:30 The Simpsons – Homer steals Comic Book Guy’s car and must prove his innocence. He needs that car! His Diamond pick-up location is in Lansing and he has to drive all that way every Tuesday evening! This is very specific to the comic book store where I used to work.

8:30-9 Bob’s Burgers – Louise wins a contest to be principal for a day and man, you have to take that possibility into account when you write the rules. You blew it, Wagstaff Elementary. And now you’re beyond saving.

NBC

10-11 Good Girls – SEASON PREMIERE! I really liked this show last season, but it’s been a while, and I can’t remember where they left off. I mean, I think things looked bad. Regardless, it’s very good and I recommend watching it.

AMC

9-10 Walking Dead – A mission to rescue a friend has deadly consequences. In my line of work, those are the only kind of consequences.

 

“A secret organization that controls all of Gotham? I that’s true, someone should tell them they’re doing a terrible job.” — Harvey Bullock

 

“I’m pretty, but tough. Like a diamond. Or beef jerky in a ball gown.” — Titus Andromedon

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